Dorothy E. Gilmore (Willett)

Dorothy E. Gilmore (Willett) - Webster, NY - Rochester Cremation

Webster, NY- July 28, 2020 at 89 years old. Dottie, as most people knew her, is predeceased by her husband John Gilmore, brother Paul Willett, sisters Grace Powell and Agnes King, son Robert Gilmore; and grandsons William Gilmore and baby John Gilmore. She is survived by her children John Gilmore, Michael  Gilmore (Barbara Bancroft), Jeanine Makhatadze-Zilinskas, Donna Gilmore-Castle (Dale Castle), Richard Gilmore (Fay Gilmore), James Gilmore (Dawn Gilmore); grandchildren Miriah Gilmore, Timothy Gilmore, Aurora Norman (Marlos),  Patrick Gilmore (Jonalie), Alison Gilmore, Michael Mead (Melissa), Laura Barber, Sarah Castle, Christopher Gilmore, Marina Willis (Keith), Tyler Gilmore, Shannon Gilmore; along with 9 great grandchildren and 6 great great grandchildren.

Her selfless, kindhearted, optimistic personality capped by her ever present smile filled the room with joy. She managed the Wegmans Eastway Fabric Department and lead inventory at all the other stores as well. Her love of sewing resulted in clothes for her children and many garments on display in the store. When her vision worsened and she could no longer thread a needle, she donated ten boxes of material for chemo blankets to be made for cancer patients.

She was the most loving and caring mom to all her seven children. She adored all her grandchildren no matter how great they were. She would do anything for all of them and always put everyone before herself. Dottie proved that laughter was the best medicine because it enabled her to fully recover from major surgeries and illnesses over the years. She insisted to walk up and down the 13 steps to her upstairs and basement until a week before her passing. “If you don’t use it, you will lose it.”

Traveling was another favorite pastime. It started with stowing away in her aunt’s car as a 6 year old child to leave her grandmother’s tobacco farm in southeast Maryland and not being discovered until arriving in Washington DC where she finished growing up and attended St Paul’s Academy. It continued with yearly visits from Webster to the DC metro area to celebrate Thanksgiving with relatives with her husband driving the station wagon full of kids in the back seat and way-back area. A six week trip around the entire US again in the trusty family station wagon along with trips to many Navy ports to visit her daughter and her family, even flying to Hawaii. Even after losing her central vision, she continued to travel with her husband and later with her family and friends to Alaska, Central Europe, Ireland, and Italy. Often times she was the navigator!

Never letting blindness stop her, Dottie continued to do everything for herself all the way up until her passing. She was determined to stay in her home until the end, which she succeeded to do. Dorothy passed very peacefully without pain or struggle in her bed with family at her side at 10:33am.

We will all miss her, but her guiding spirit will live on within us.

Dorothy’s Catholic Funeral Mass will be at Holy Cross Church, 4492 Lake Avenue, Rochester, NY 14612 at 11am on Wednesday August 19, 2020. Internment immediately following at Holy Sepulchre Cemetery with her wake at Curry Lodge at Kent Park in Webster, NY. from 4:00-9:00. In lieu of flowers, please consider donating to the Association for the Blind and Visually Impaired (ABVI), 422 S. Clinton Ave, Rochester, NY 14620-1198 in Dorothy’s name.

All are welcome, but due to Covid considerations, we recognize that many who wish to join us may not be able to and we respect that. The Funeral Mass will be live streamed from HolyCrossRochester.org and we will have a GoogleMeet session set-up at the celebration gathering to enable everybody to be a part of Dorothy’s celebration. Contact Jim or your family representative for details.

Please share your memories with us.

35 Condolences

  1. Leland Gilmore Jr. on August 3, 2020 at 10:10 pm

    To my godmother…will miss you …thank you for kindness and your friendship towards my mother,Eloise Gilmore. Prayers for a wonderful journey ahead

    • John Gilmore on September 29, 2020 at 10:58 pm

      So kind . Thank you .

  2. John Gilmore on August 4, 2020 at 3:24 am

    Ma , went to call you Sunday for our weekly ” 60 Minutes ” TV show pre-talk. Old habits are already starting to die hard. Two things I will never forget. One , the two week trip to Ireland with my daughter , Miriah . Secondly , being a difficult learner , you drilled the homework into my head and helped me come up with an acceptable GPA to get me into college. Thanks , MA. Hot on your tail.

  3. Suzanne Becker on August 5, 2020 at 8:17 am

    Jim, Dawn, Shannon & Tyler we are so very sorry for your loss! We were very blessed to meet Mrs. Gilmore a few times, especially at the Perinton concert she was thrilled to attend. Cherish the wonderful memories you have of mom/grandma. We will keep you all in our prayers.

    Love Suzanne, Steve Erin & Rachel

    • John Gilmore on September 29, 2020 at 10:59 pm

      So kind . Thank you .

  4. Tammy (Gilmore) Cavanagh-Cowart on August 5, 2020 at 10:55 am

    Oh Dottie, I miss you so much. You were always such a strong grounding, an inspiration, a comfort and an encouragement to me to never give up throughout the many struggles in my life. You were more of a mother to me than my birth mother. Thank you for being such a wonderful person and for making this world a better place with the beautiful way you touched everyone’s life. I’m looking forward to spending eternity with you and so many others who love the Lord God Almighty, Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit.
    I love you and you will forever be in my heart!
    Tammy (Gilmore) Cavanagh-Cowart

    • John Gilmore on September 29, 2020 at 11:01 pm

      Mom talked of you all the time . She loved you. Thank you for the condolences.

  5. Donna Gilmore-Castle on August 5, 2020 at 2:49 pm

    Mom, miss you already!! Love you!! RIP!! Love, Donna

  6. Steve Dudek on August 5, 2020 at 5:53 pm

    I know she will live in the many lives she knew forever. We were blessed to know her and we are sorry for your loss. You have our sympathy and prayers of peace and comfort.
    ~ Steve, Gerri, Bethany, and Rachel

    • John Gilmore on September 29, 2020 at 11:02 pm

      Very kind of you. Thank you.

  7. Brian Riordan on August 6, 2020 at 4:11 pm

    Fond memories as a kid when the station wagon full of the Gilmore family would visit to celebrate Thanksgiving, along with Grandma Gilmore, Uncles Leland and Benny and their family. It was a miracle the whole gang fit in that tiny house. The stories back and forth, and of course Aunt Dot, keeping the stories straight, was extraordinarily fun to listen to. I can here Dot’s laugh now, she was lots of fun to be with. Our hearts are saddened, Aunt Dot will be dearly missed, but we will have all the wonderful memories to share. Our thoughts and prayers are with the Gilmore family.
    Love, Brian & Linda

    • John Gilmore on September 29, 2020 at 11:07 pm

      Liked forward every year to our visit to Aunt Helen and Uncle Jimmy’s . All the other Aunts and Uncles and cousins packed into your house . I think I ate at the kids table till I was 20 yo ! No room at the adult table. And then all the ” kids ” would go downstairs to the grotto to hang out. Glad you remember those times fondly. Thank you.

  8. Annette Polizzi on August 9, 2020 at 10:11 am

    My condolences to Dottie’ family. I had the pleasure of working with Dottie at Wegmans s Fabric department so many years ago.
    She was always cheerful to work with and very responsible. I can still remember some of her humorous quotes.
    My God bless her and may she Rest In Peace.
    Annette Polizzi

    • John Gilmore on September 29, 2020 at 11:08 pm

      So kind . Thank you .

  9. Donna (Enfonde) Kongerslev on August 9, 2020 at 11:59 am

    I dreaded the day I would read about Dottie’s passing. I didn’t see or talk to her often, but we always had the best visits! I last spoke to her around the holidays. The years went by, but she always sounded the same. I will always remember her distinctive voice and that wonderful laugh! I will miss her! She was the best! My sincerely condolences to the family. RIP Dottie

    (I was previously married to a friend of John’s and Mike’s — Jerry Hubbard.)

    • John Gilmore on August 15, 2020 at 9:12 pm

      Thank you for keeping in touch with Ma for so long. Thank you Donna.

  10. Christine and David Gulisano on August 9, 2020 at 1:48 pm

    To the Gilmore family. We are so sorry for your loss. Dottie’s passing is a loss to all that knew her. She was 1 of my mothers best friends (Marilyn Curry) they met at Wegmans many years ago and spent many Saturday”s traveling to craft sales and festivals together. Dotttie was like family to us she came to many family picnics at our home and we would listen to the stories of her travels and the people she knew. It was many years later that we learned she was legally blind and hardly believed it because she always called us by name when she greeted us. The Gilmore children were lucky to have such a wonder independent mother. She would talk about all of you and adored each and everyone of her children, grandchildren and great grandchildren. May she rest in peace

    • John Gilmore on September 29, 2020 at 11:09 pm

      Mom talked of your Mom , Marilyn , often . She loved her. Thanks for your thoughts.

  11. Dominick Mancini on August 11, 2020 at 6:37 am

    So sorry for your loss John and to your family.

    • John Gilmore on September 29, 2020 at 11:10 pm

      Thanks , Dom. You are a good friend.

  12. Teresa (Gilmore) Cantrell on August 15, 2020 at 8:02 pm

    You always had a smile at the crowded, loud Gilmore family gatherings! I enjoyed your visits and how you would pretend you could see even with limited vision. I will always fondly remember crab cake lunches with you and my mom.
    You were an amazing friend to her !!! Miss you so much

    • John Gilmore on September 29, 2020 at 11:13 pm

      Mom really loved you and your family. She updated us as to your life story very time she called you . Thanks for your kind thoughts.

  13. Preston Turner on August 19, 2020 at 10:36 am

    Dear Dottie I’ll miss you very much. We had a lot of fun over the 35 years. Antiquing, shopping, boating, eating out & going for ice cream & many other adventures.

    • John Gilmore on September 29, 2020 at 11:14 pm

      Thanks , Preston . Mom cherished all your time with her.

  14. Michael P Gilmore on August 19, 2020 at 3:32 pm

    Best Mom. Ever.
    That is how you start to describe your own mom at that young age where the little plaque fits on the plastic trophy.

    Generous, as many know of her contributions toward education, which she valued highly. While always frugal to the max, she instead used what funds she could spare to aid the students among her family seeking higher education.

    She loved to travel, to be with people, and really could not pass up a Rose Garden. Her own little gardens were by necessity small as she was not herself able to provide laborious care due to physical limitations but she could connive others to do the contributing efforts. But she kept the interior of her home as presentable as any, and antiques and arts, and crafts, are abundant. So were the photos displayed in the Sitting room.

    She put a lot of energy into the passion of travel, everybody has taken her to places once her faculties no longer allowed for her to “steer the boat”. Barbara and I enjoyed her company (with Alison) for three weeks in Europe, where our Swiss hosts Sylvette and Martin drove us all about Switzerland and a piece of northern Italy to wind up in the Ticino area of Locarno and Lugano. A particularly intriguing part of that visit was the Ballenburg open-air museum near Interlaken with it’s hilly unpaved path going door to door among relocated houses and industries of centuries old lifestyles. Martin and I pushed her wheelchair in “four-wheel-drive”. It was a place similar to Mumford historical site in New York, but without the paving. She really enjoyed that history-comes-alive approach, much like the historical mill district along the Genesee River in Rochester. Museums and Zoos always presented an attraction for her to satisfy her urge to learn.

    She had a Forgiving nature and rarely held a grudge. She was always showing faith that you might learn your lessons from your own school of hard knocks and get back on track.
    She had a gift for Guidance; rarely stern, when necessary, but always willing to participate in positive thinking when helping others who were approaching those tough decisions that Life always expects of you, mostly unexpectedly. She was a trooper in that regard for her own twists in life, especially when health begins to fail.
    And of course, toughing out through those misfortunes that beset her from time to time, bouncing back to be able to manage her household, for she wanted not to end her visit on this earth in any setting but her own.

    If you love them set them free. – that is what it said on a stitched sampler by the door. I guess so you could see it on the way out…

    This is a person who is already profoundly missed, but I for one am so much better for her loving approach to life as she shared it with me.

  15. Barbara Bancroft (Michael Gilmore's wife) on August 20, 2020 at 1:43 pm

    I could not have had a more loving, smart, joyful mother-in-law. She always seemed to be there for me if I needed to talk. And was fun to be with when we were ready to party. She encouraged celebration in the best of times and reflection in the worst of times. I loved how she would refer to people as Souls. Dottie has been a blessing to me and to all the souls that crossed her path. Rest in peace, sweet lady. We will never forget you and always love you.

  16. Donna Gilmore-Castle on August 20, 2020 at 9:21 pm

    Dearest Mom,
    We had your Funeral Mass at Holy Cross Church on Lake Ave in Charlotte yesterday. It was beautiful. Your ashes are in the lighthouse urn that was on top of the china closet in the kitchen. Just perfect. We took the lighthouse urn to Holy Sepulchre Cemetery and as a keepsake put the little mahogany sewing pin/thimble box with a thimble and a threaded needle on top in a niche with a glass front with your name on it. This way we can go visit and are able to visually see this lighthouse urn representing you. The best. Then we had a celebration of life at Kent Park. We used Curry Lodge there for our gathering. We decorated outdoor roses there like you had requested. John, Jeanine, myself, Richard, and Jim were present. It was awesome. Jim and Dawn had set up the tables with yellow tablecloths, making it very bright. Each table having a square piece of lighthouse material as a center doily with a jar that had a stenciled lighthouse on it. With stones in the bottom with a hydrangea, from the Doser’s hydrangea bushes and water. Just beautiful. Mrs. Doser made baked beans, cut fresh fruit, german potato salad. She is amazing. Jim had the mass live streamed so our relatives were able to connect and watch the mass from their home computers due to COVID-19. Jim also had the gathering live streamed also so our relatives could chime in from home. Jim and Dawn made photo boards, Jim had food catered from Guida’s. I made zucchini bread, Dawn made cut out cookies. And of course our toast with Willett whiskey, It was the greatest. Jim and Dawn out did themselves, you’d have been very, very proud. It was the PERFECT day!!!

    • Barbara Bancroft on August 21, 2020 at 3:27 pm

      The events were lovely. I am so sorry we could not be there to share it with you. Thank you for describing the events and acknowledging all the work Jim and Dawn did for it. I hope some of our photos were included on the photo boards. I have been embracing them often these last couple weeks. I think Dottie would have loved everything about this celebration.

  17. Donna Gilmore-Castle on August 21, 2020 at 12:43 pm

    Dear Mom,
    First I want to commend Jim and Dawn for stepping up on giving you the best care ever during your last years, year, months, weeks, days, and hours of life. You became exclusively a huge part of their life. They gave you the best of care I feel the rest of us were not able to do at the time. They were the greatest. I know they were very, very much appreciated by you and the rest of us. I can’t thank them enough.

    Mom, you were the. best. mom. ever.
    You were there and conquered each and every seven of us successfully. No doubt about that. We were all different, we all needed different care, and we all got what each one needed. You were there since birth, my baptismal, my first day of school. my communion, my confirmation, high school graduation, marriage, Sarah’s birth, Sarah’s child life, Sarah’s graduation, Sarah’s first college graduation, to her most recent graduation in May, 2019; getting her Doctorate from Cornell University College of Veterinary Medicine. Support through her first year as a Veterinarian.

    I will always remember our travel through Italy. We stopped at Venice, Murano, Florence, and Rome. And as much as you couldn’t see we sure did see alot and yes you were my tour director, believe it or not!
    Thanks Mom for all of your love and support which will never be forgotten and to live fon orever in my heart!
    Your loving daughter, Donna

    • Donna Gilmore-Castle on August 21, 2020 at 12:45 pm

      *forever*

  18. Donna (Enfonde) Kongerslev on August 24, 2020 at 5:48 pm

    To Dottie’s Children:

    I am so glad I came to the wake on Wednesday. It was a so nice to see all of you again after all these years — in spite of the sad circumstances. I am sorry that Mike and Barb couldn’t make it. John and I really took a walk down memory lane!

    Dottie would have been proud of all of you and thrilled that you all have such wonderful memories of her! She most certainly will be missed.

    Donna (Enfonde) Kongerslev

    • John Gilmore on September 29, 2020 at 11:16 pm

      Quite a conversation we had ! Thanks so much for coming. What a surprise.

  19. Patti (Eder) Mistretta on September 2, 2020 at 1:50 pm

    Donna, your I am so sorry for the passing of your Mom. Saw her at the neighborhood picnic and she knew who I was right away and when I introduced her to my husband I introduced her as “Mom”. Always called her that and still did. Hopefully she is chatting up in heaven with Jackie and they are sharing Mom memories of you and I. Love to your family, Patti

  20. John Gilmore on September 29, 2020 at 11:17 pm

    Very kind . Thank you.

  21. Donna Gilmore-Castle on February 1, 2024 at 11:06 pm

    here it is Thurs. Feb. 1, 2024 at 10:52 pm and just came across this obituary by accident as I was Googling Sarah Castle dvm Rochester NY. Google picked up on the Castle name in the obituary so I read the whole thing along with all the condolences. Mom the tears flowed as I read it and all the lovely thoughts that were said about you by so many along with such a beautiful celebration!! miss you so much, so much going on in people’s lives we wish you could be here for!! until we meet again!! your forever in my heart!! love you!! RIP Mom your loving daughter, Donna

Leave a Condolence





This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.