Irondequoit, NY: November 11, 2017.
Raymond Ralph Bray was born in East Rochester Dec. 28, 1924, to Pauline (nee Rutyna) and Clarence Bray.
He grew up in Solvay NY with his mother and stepfather, Clarence Oatman, and four siblings, Clara, Walter, Clarence, and Elizabeth. Ray never forgot his mother’s sacrifices for her children or the example she set as a parent. To help the family financially through the Depression, Ray set pins at a Solvay bowling alley, helped a milkman make deliveries in the early morning hours before school, labored summers on local farms and on the grounds of the State Fair, keeping just enough of his weekly earnings for a hot fudge sundae. From ages 17 to 19, he worked on locomotives at the roundhouse for the N.Y. Central Railroad, the youngest on the crew, doing a man’s job.
Ray joined the U.S. Navy in 1943 and proudly served until 1946 on a destroyer, the USS Hobson 464, which was converted to a destroyer/minesweeper DMS 26 in 1945. The many battles the Hobson engaged in during WW2 were intense and dangerous. Ray took part in D-Day at Normandy at Utah Beach in 1944 where the Hobson’s sister ship the USS Corry hit a mine and was sunk. Ray assisted in the rescue of survivors. At Okinawa in 1945 another sister ship, the USS Pringle, was sunk in a kamikaze attack and the Hobson was badly damaged. Hobson crew members including Ray took turns entering a darkened smoke-filled forward engine room, groping for instruments to get the Hobson powered up and running again. The Hobson took on Pringle survivors, and buried some of their own Hobson shipmates at sea. The Navy took higher casualties at Okinawa than in any similar period in history, 4907 killed, 4824 wounded; 36 ships sunk, and 368 damaged.
Of the many who served, Ray was one of the fortunate who survived. He married, built a home on Braddocks Bay, and raised a family. He was a problem-solver who could think through, build, and repair anything, a hard worker and devoted family man. His face lit up with joy when holding a great-grandchild. He worked at Kodak for 36 years, until 1983. A long and happy retirement (almost 35 years) gave him time to enjoy ice-fishing, traveling, his summer home in the 1000 Islands, and winters in Florida.
Ray will be remembered for his warmth and friendliness, his beautiful smile, his endless range of skills; his generosity, his love of the outdoors, and a willingness to share his love and knowledge of fishing, hunting, and boating with the younger generation. Ray also enjoyed bowling, gardening, reading, long walks, and opera. He followed college basketball (Go Syracuse), pro-golf, and football. He was a baker, a cook, and a daily breakfast maker. He was an entertaining storyteller and a wonderful husband.
The same qualities that made him a trustworthy shipmate were evident throughout his life. He had a common sense approach to things and was guided by a moral compass in all endeavors.
Predeceased by his parents and stepfather, his brothers Walt and Bud, sister Clara, and his “like a Dad to me” father-in-law Ludger.
Ray is survived and cherished by his beloved wife of 42 years, Judith (nee Torch) Bray, with whom he shared an unbreakable bond of love and trust. Also survived by his children Thomas (Kim), Tamara (Todd) Fuhrmann, Patricia (Herbie) Shaffer, Mary Jane, Raymond (Chris), Deborah (Fred) Belcher; 14 grandchildren, 22 great-grandchildren; sister Elizabeth (Howard) VanBuren, brother-in-law Charles (Penny) Torch, sister-in-law Shirley Torch; nieces and nephews, special niece Paula.
Ray’s final deployment was on Veterans Day, Nov. 11, 2017, sailing for Heaven’s shores where his loved ones, his Hobson shipmates, and fishing buddies eagerly welcomed his return to home port . Family and friends gathered on April 18, 2018 at the RC Church of the Epiphany in Port Orange Florida to honor and celebrate his long and full life. Ray will be missed by all who knew and loved him.
Condolences to Ray’s family. It was a pleasure knowing you, cousin.
RIP uncle Ray. I wish we stayed in touch after my dad died.